One of the entries to the “Chalk the Block” competition in El Paso, Texas.
Here’s a website with more photos taken by the photographer of this image:
This all came from a recent quote out of “How I met your mother”:
“Love is trusting someone enough to tell them what’s really bothering you.” - Arthur
(also from talking extensively with my boyfriend about communication in general)
I’ve been thinking more and more about how egocentrism is inevitable - actually, that’s pretty much the theme of my college career. When I first entered college I just wanted everyone to like me…like most do. Many want to come out from their limited and naive high school bubble and find people just like them, with minds that are able to exchange significant ideas and form some kind of connection with them.
I think so far in college though, I have taken it too far. I often remain silent, or add to a conversation via agreement. I do it because I know I can get a positive response out of whoever I am talking to by agreeing with them. But slowly (very slowly) I’ve come to realize how pointless that is. If someone agrees with me in an argument, I don’t think about how much I like the person (although that is definitely an effect) - I think about how right I am - and how elated my ego feels, not theirs. The agreers are supporting characters, but I pay them no mind.
The hardest for me to realize and confront, which is why the process has taken so long, is that the whole time I allow others’ opinions to dominate my own I have seen it as an act of connecting through submission. I don’t necessarily agree but I never counter, and I also have seen it in the past almost as a favor because it avoids conflict. (Yes I now understand this is illogical because no one ends up knowing what I think at all).
But I think I have finally learned, albeit tumultuously and not without collateral damage, that conflict is necessary. Conflict is unavoidable if you want to make an impact on someone and if you want to bond with them. But conflict also does not mean fighting. Conflict means you trust the person you confront to not react with the intention of hurting you, and you do the same. People are just different and sometimes you’ve got to find out why and find a middle ground. So, the next time I have an opinion, I’m going to say it, and I’m not going to make the situation into an attacker/victim or a dominate/submit dynamic in my own mind, because that is illogical.
I feel like my professors are raping me this quarter with multiple papers and exams every week, I need to find a place to live, I need to find income and get experience for a career, AND keep my current job because it’s helping me survive on the shit amount of money the university gives me to live on.
WHAT. THE. FUCK. fuck all of you, professors and university-running assholes
For once I want to be pampered >:(
Pms + quitting smoking again —> not taking anyone’s shit